Lip Service

God has been holding my nose to the grindstone lately.

It’s about saying things with my lips that I don’t really mean in my heart.

I never really noticed that I did this until one day recently over lunch with a friend. I was talking to her about how I was super comfortable with my current weight and what size I was and that I never really wanted to be a size four, anyway. Leaving our lunch date, I got in my car and started to pull out of the parking lot when I happened to catch a glimpse of myself in the rearview mirror. It was then that it hit me. I was a big ‘ole liar. Here I had just been having a great conversation with my girlfriend that I loved and wouldn’t think of lying to, and I had not told her the truth! It wasn’t that I was trying to deceive her. I told her what I wanted to believe was true and what I wished were true, but was not the total and complete truth. Because the truth is that I do not always love or embrace my body.

Like…well…today, for instance. But I won't go into that right now, as it's slightly irrelevant to this blog post. :)

But my issues with lip service are not just relegated to issues with my current size. It’s with matters much important than the numbers on the scale.

I also sometimes say things with my lips that I don’t mean in my heart, when it comes to spiritual matters. Like when I tell someone I will pray for them and I don’t. Ashamedly, that was something I used to do from time to time -- I'd say I would, with the best of intentions, but then I wouldn’t. Because of that grindstone thing, God won’t let me do it anymore. If I say it, He reminds me until I do it. The truth is, I need it to be that way. Otherwise, I could easily fall into just giving lip service, again.

But it grieves me the most when I say things to my beautiful Jesus with my lips that I don’t really mean in my heart.

Like when I tell Him I love Him…but don’t take time to communicate with Him. Where’s the proof of my love in denying Him conversation?

Or when I tell Him I need Him…but try to do things my way first, just in case I’m right. How would He know I need Him when my actions say I don’t?

Or when I tell Him I’ll serve Him…but run away from things that seem too scary or out of my control. Can He feel my desire to serve Him by me bailing all the time?

Or when I tell Him I will put nothing before Him…but then usher the little "g" gods in my life to the front of the line and move Him to the back. What priority does that show when things other than Him have my full attention and He doesn’t?

As much as those things grieve me, I know they grieve Him even more. How much He must tire of me flapping my lips all the time without any substance to my words. After all, He is a God who is really not into lip service. He is not a promiser who doesn’t deliver. When He says He will love me, He does. When He says He will help me, He will. When He says He will be enough, He is. He makes good on His Word and every Word of His is true. He just doesn’t do the lip service thing. It’s not in His character.

But sometimes, I do. Sometimes, it is in mine.

And every time I do, I'm reminded of the verse in Deuteronomy (23:23) that reminds me of where He stands on the whole lip service issue...

“Whatever your lips utter you must be sure to do, because you made your vow freely to the LORD your God with your own mouth.” (NIV)

This verse reminds me that Jesus is only about talk when it is backed up with action. He wants me to do what I say what I will do and mean what I say I mean. He wants me to evaluate myself and take my own inventory so I can begin to catch myself when I begin to slip into lip service patterns of yesterday. It’s called discernment. Godly wisdom. And it’s another element to being completely and totally for real.

It’s just a harder one for me to do, sometimes. But I have to…

…when I’m committing to pray for someone.

…or professing my love for God through a worship song or in private conversations between the two of us.

…or talking to a girlfriend over lunch about my current size.

It’s about telling the truth – to God. To others. And yes, even to myself.

It’s being mindful to never say things with my lips that I don’t mean in my heart.

Which means, by the way, that I should probably be doing a lot less talking these days.